Day Three: Dripstones and Raccoons

All’s well that starts poorly

Editors note: Apologies as this has not been proofread and we are a day or two behind on posting. Finding an intersection of leisure time and a stable connection is proving rather difficult. Thank you for your patience!

Mammoth Cave National Park, KY - July 1, 2025 - It was a dark and stormy night. What? It was!

Banana Bread was fast asleep next to me as the storm finally kicked in. In all of my years camping, the sound of rain pouring down and amplified by the tent was something I’d only heard once before, and that time it flooded. When that happened, I stepped out into the tempest and threw a tarp over the tent in a futile attempt to keep our gear dry.

This time was different. I had much more confidence in our setup and BB’s insistence on the proper use of guy lines— those little ropes that most people ignore. He insisted that we stake them down and in so doing, pull the sides and angles of the tent out forcing rain to flow away from the interior of our tent.

We woke up-(again a term implying sleep that did not come) and for the most part, the tent stayed dry. The fly was soaked and the corners were moist. But our sleeping gear was all dry. The rest we could stuff in our emergency IKEA bag and dry off in Kentucky.

Breakfast was oatmeal. I’ve since switched to Apple & Cinnamon, but Banana Bread is devout in his love of Maple and Brown Sugar. We poured boiling water into the open paper packets and breakfast was served.

On the road we had to take our best guess at the direction because GPS wasn’t available. We drove up and down through the Appalachian mountains and found our route. Residual rain and fog made for slow going, but we eventually emerged from the Park.

BB fell asleep as we twisted through the lush mountains trapping small clouds in their valleys and crevasses against an otherwise blue sky. About an hour in, every warning light on my dashboard lit up. Transmission - red exclamation. Check Engine.

My heart sank. Not only would this trip be over before it really began, but everything from here on out would be awful. I could already see diagnoses, repair estimates, staying stranded in some po’dunk town off of the highway in the middle of nowhere, West Virginia. And, of course, the bill would come and I’d have to accept whatever price it was.

The Jeep was driving fine. No noticeable problem. We pulled into the nearest rest stop and I rebooted the car. I’ve had a similar situation happen before but not on this scale and with these stakes.

When I restarted the car, several warnings disappeared, but the Check Engine light stayed on. Since I had to continue anyway, I figured we could make it a little further.

Back on the road, the Jeep was driving well. So we kept going. An hour away from Mammoth Cave, I decided to go all the way. Feeling more confident, I figured, if I could get to the camp and let it rest, it might just reboot. I considered unplugging the battery to give it a full reset, but then I would lose my mileage and trip timer. We also had tickets to tour Mammoth Cave at 2:45 and there was a big question about time zones and when we would cross.

So we drove across Kentucky listening to bluegrass, the Lord of the Rings audio books, and when I gave in, various video game soundtracks. I considered stopping to get some bourbon as a gift, but given everything— I figured it was best not to compound my problems with Kentucky’s finest.

As we neared Mammoth Cave, we marveled at the incredible kitsch and Americana flanking us on both sides of the road. “Dinosaur World” and “Cave Land” and “Big Mike’s Rock Shop and Mystery House” which promised ‘fun for the whole family— free fossils with every visit.’ Each adorned with life-sized dinos or Yogi Bear (for some reason).

The car was doing fine as we passed the official Mammoth Cave National Park sign. We quickly found our camping spot which was within walking distance to the Visitor Center. We also found the camp store which had WiFi, showers, and laundry.

I rebooted the Jeep again and the “Check Engine Light” had disappeared! That, plus the inviting campsite completely changed my mood.

The Descent

We made our way to the tour, stamped our National Parks Passport books, and descended into the caves. Before we got underway, the Ranger noticed Banana Bread’s Minecraft tshirt and told him that the creator of Minecraft had visited Mammoth Cave while he was developing it. A fact I still need to confirm, but it made BB’s day.

We had recently visited Luray Caverns in Virginia— which are remarkable even if I can’t get over their ticket prices or that something like that can be privately owned - check that history out. So I had pretty high standards for these caves.

We were both really impressed with the descent. We were warned that there were tight spaces, but I figured, if that rotund Ranger can make it through, so can I. You really did have to squeeze through crevasses but nothing too difficult. The sheer size of the caves and the fact that they still haven’t explored them all was noteworthy. The history and the storytelling was almost more interesting. Halfway through, I just felt like we were walking through repeating rock tunnels.

Banana Bread was more focused on the spiders. And rightly so. They were everywhere and they were quite large. Something I probably wouldn’t have noticed had I been alone.

The tour ended, as all tours should with a grand finale—the famed ‘Frozen Niagara’ with drips that seemed paused mid-flow. Stalagmites and stalactites behind fences of all shapes and sizes lined our exit. The Ranger stood with a light on an insect ahead of us which turned out to be a cave cricket. I guess I never really thought about the creatures, besides bats, that live that far down.

We ascended a flight of stairs and I was surprised to be greeted by daylight. I had thought the tour was two hours but that time included the shuttle bus driving time to and from the caves. Either way. I was good with what we saw and BB was impressed with the Minecraft of it all so we were ready to go back to camp and take our first shower in three days with no small amount of enthusiasm.

Rookie mistake

The showers were their own special adventure. We had been to camp showers before, but these were not very private and coin operated. It’s hard to put pants back on with one wet foot in a flip flop and the other in the air while three other dudes are in line for the showers. Still the showers were clean and so were we.

Back at camp, Banana Bread scolded me for leaving the soft cooler open. When I swore I hadn’t, he realized that a creature had eaten through the zipper and stolen his Wonder Bread. I can’t believe we forgot about raccoons. We didn’t leave food out but I had forgotten that they can get into just about anything.

Undaunted, we cleaned up the camp for any remaining food issues. And went to bed. The night was cool and dry and it was the best sleep we had since we started the trip.

Tomorrow - Meet us in St Louis. (And Indiana. And Illinois. Seriously, I really need to look at maps before these drives.)

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